Understanding Your Feelings: A Friendly Guide for Survivors of Sexual Assault

Oct 07, 2024

Hey there, friend!

If you’re reading this, chances are you’ve been through a lot, and I want to take a moment to acknowledge that. Surviving sexual assault is a journey filled with complex emotions, and sometimes it can be challenging to know how you’re really feeling. It’s normal to experience a whirlwind of emotions, but understanding those feelings can be an essential step in your healing process. So, how do you know if you’re truly feeling your emotions? Let’s explore some friendly tips to help you navigate this path.

1. Recognize the Emotional Rollercoaster

After experiencing trauma, you may feel like you’re on an emotional rollercoaster, with highs and lows that can change from moment to moment. One minute, you might feel angry or sad, and the next, you could be laughing or feeling happy. Understanding that this is a normal part of healing can help you give yourself grace.

Tip: Keep a journal where you can write down your emotions daily. It doesn’t have to be elaborate; just a few sentences about how you’re feeling can help you track your emotional changes over time.

2. Check for Physical Reactions

Sometimes, our bodies react to emotions before our minds do. Pay attention to how your body feels. Are you tense or anxious? Do you experience headaches, stomachaches, or fatigue? Physical sensations can be signs of unprocessed emotions.

Tip: Practice mindfulness or deep breathing exercises to connect with your body and observe any sensations. Ask yourself, “What am I feeling right now, and where do I feel it in my body?”

3. Identify Triggers

As a survivor, you may have specific triggers that bring up intense emotions or memories. These triggers can be sounds, smells, or even certain conversations. Recognizing what triggers you can help you understand your feelings and respond to them more effectively.

Tip: Make a list of potential triggers you’ve noticed. This can help you anticipate your reactions and develop coping strategies when you encounter them.

4. Reflect on Your Thoughts

Take some time to reflect on your thoughts. Are they negative or self-critical? Do you find yourself blaming yourself for what happened? Acknowledge these thoughts without judgment and recognize that they’re part of the healing process.

Tip: Challenge negative thoughts by asking yourself, “Is this thought true?” or “What would I tell a friend in my situation?” This can help you reframe your thinking in a more positive light.

5. Embrace the Range of Emotions

You might find that you feel a mix of emotions, from sadness and anger to relief and joy. Allowing yourself to experience the full range of feelings can be incredibly liberating. Healing isn’t about getting rid of emotions; it’s about processing them.

Tip: Give yourself permission to feel whatever comes up. If you feel like crying, let it out! If you want to laugh, allow yourself to do that too. Emotions are meant to be felt.

6. Seek Support

It’s essential to have a support system, whether it’s friends, family, or a therapist. Talking about your feelings with someone who understands can provide comfort and perspective. You don’t have to go through this alone!

Tip: Reach out to a trusted friend and say, “I’d love to talk about what I’m feeling. Can we chat?” Having someone to listen can make a world of difference.

7. Celebrate Your Progress

Recognizing your feelings is a crucial part of healing, and it’s important to celebrate the steps you take, no matter how small they may seem. Acknowledge the courage it takes to confront your emotions and honor your journey.

Tip: Create a “progress jar” where you can add notes about your feelings, accomplishments, or moments of joy. When you’re feeling low, revisit the jar for a boost of encouragement.

Final Thoughts: Trust Your Journey

As you navigate the complex emotions that come with surviving sexual assault, remember to be kind to yourself. It’s okay to have ups and downs, and it’s important to honor your feelings as they arise. Healing is a process, and everyone’s journey looks different.

Trust yourself, lean on your support system, and embrace the journey of self-discovery. You are not alone, and your feelings matter. If you ever feel overwhelmed, remember it’s okay to seek help and take time for yourself.

With warmth and understanding,

Kathe'rine