Notes From The Founder :Shame and the Flight of Sparrows
"Shame and the Flight of Sparrows"
I’ve always marveled at the way different birds fly to different places when the seasons change. Some travel thousands of miles, chasing the warmth and safety of a place where they can survive and thrive. Watching them, I see a reflection of something deep within us. We, too, are like birds—constantly navigating the changing seasons of our lives, trying to find a place where we can heal, grow, and feel safe again. But sometimes, shame weighs us down, making us feel like we don’t deserve to fly.
When I think about shame, I picture a sparrow in the storm. She tries to soar, but the wind and rain beat against her wings, making it hard to stay in the air. Shame can feel like that storm—a force pushing us down, whispering lies that we are not worthy, that our past defines us. It tells us that we should stay grounded, that we are too broken to fly. And for a time, I believed those lies.
After my assault, shame was the heaviest burden I carried. It wasn’t just the act of what happened that haunted me; it was the feeling that I somehow deserved the pain. Shame convinced me that I had done something wrong, that I was to blame, that I would never be whole again. I felt like a bird too ashamed to return to her flock, too afraid to spread her wings.
But something happens when you watch birds closely. They don’t stay in one place forever. They don’t stay in the storm. When the weather turns, they follow their instincts and fly to a new place—a place where they can breathe, stretch, and heal. And I began to realize that I, too, had the right to fly again, to move away from the shame that held me back and into a new season of healing.
Healing without shame is not about forgetting what has happened or pretending it didn’t hurt. It’s about understanding that, like the sparrow, you are not meant to stay in the storm forever. You are meant to move forward, to find warmth and light again. You are allowed to heal. Shame tries to keep us trapped in the winter, but healing is about recognizing that we are worthy of the spring.
There was a day when I looked in the mirror and saw the weight of shame in my eyes. But instead of turning away, I imagined myself as a bird taking flight again. I pictured myself leaving the cold behind, moving toward the warmth of something new—a place where I could rest my wings without judgment, without fear. That place is healing.
I won’t tell you that the journey is easy. Flying away from shame requires courage. It requires letting go of the belief that you are defined by your pain. But it is possible. Just as birds trust that they will find a safe place to land, you, too, can trust that there is a space for you beyond shame—a space filled with compassion, grace, and healing.
You are not meant to stay grounded forever. No matter how heavy the weight of shame feels, it cannot keep you from the sky. You are a sparrow, and sparrows are meant to fly.
---
From the Founder:
I want you to know that shame does not define you. I have been there—feeling like the storm would never end, like my wings would never carry me again. But I learned something powerful along the way: we are not broken beyond repair, and we are not meant to live in shame.
Here at Sparrows of Hope, we walk this journey together. Our stories are intertwined, and in this space, you are seen, valued, and loved. Healing is possible, and you don’t have to carry the weight of shame alone. Together, we find the courage to spread our wings and fly again.
With all my heart,
Kathe'rine
Founder, Sparrows of Hope
---
Resources for Further Reading
RAINN: Understanding Shame
NSVRC: Healing from Sexual Violence
